So it is that time of the year... the Perseid time... We were up on Mt Royal, yes, I know, but it's hard to organize too many people to go out of the city at such short notice. We didn't see too many, between the 6-8 of us we must have seen about 10 distinct shooting stars.
So there was all this typical office banter... a combination of they love to tease me and I am a good teasee... I remember when I left MN I was pretty sure I had exhausted my quota of nice co-workers in life. I had the nicest office mates, funny, politically incorrect in speech, but not really... In fact I wrote in my thesis, "if there's one thing, I hope I will find office mates half as fun as you were". Today, a year and almost 3 months later, I know I found even better.
I think jokes form an integral part of any relationship. The thing with new relationships (I use this term loosely), is that neither party knows where to draw the line and neither party knows where the line was drawn, so they are always second guessing, "were they really kidding?". It does take a lot of trial and error to settle in to this equilibrium. The past year has brought that equilibrium to us. In a way, faster and more solid than it was with my MN office mates. It might be because we really went head on with this, which meant, of course, a lot of errors, not too many trials. :) It is partly because of the way of the French Canadians (I was corrected the other day: they are no French Canadians, they are French Quebecois). The stereo type goes they have almost no boundaries physically: they stand close, they are very touchy, they kiss etc etc. This is different from both Sri Lanka and the US. In the US and in fact most other European friends of mine, maintain a very strict physical territory - a radius of 50cm around them is usually claimed! (I know it sound weird when you say it, but it is true...). I was in fact only a little bit uncomfortable when I first came to Montreal, soon I began to see Americans as a bunch of uptight-for-no-reason group of people. (It was funny, two of my American friends visited me recently and we met this French guy who one of my friends thought invaded her private physical space when he talked to her - and I did not notice this at all; and this American friend of mine, I always thought was one of the less uptight Americans!!!). What was hard for me to get used to was their very cavalier attitude about personal details. I can not ever do this to anyone else, but really I am glad they came head on at me in this aspect, even when I protested; today I know I am that much more comfortable with them because of this, mostly! I was told one time by a French Quebecois, when I complained about how I felt they were invasive of my personal details, that they do this because they are not judgmental. Actually I think this is true for most of them, general human missteps are accepted as things that do happen to everyone, and you are not scarred for life because of these.
I love them, I really do....
So now back to the star gazing... so the city suggests not driving your car up Mt Royal. So I decide I am gonna take the metro and then walk up there. Now I was very well aware that by the time we finish, the metro would have stopped and I will either have to walk, rent a bixi or take a taxi home, and I was well prepared to do this. Because also I have no fear of walking alone at night. Now of course when it's time to leave at 2:00am, people are not ready to let me walk alone. And the guy who did drive the car brought a telescope, so he did not have room for all of us, so now who gets a ride? Is it Mary and Ben who live the farthest? Is it Simon, Mary or Ben who are afraid to walk by themselves at night? Ohhhhhhh no... it is me who lives not as far as Mary and Ben and who also is not afraid of walking alone and who also happens to *want* to walk. As the discussion progresses I realize this is not going anywhere, I suggest take Mary and Ben as they live furthest, so I kiss them all and start walking down the mountain, Simon joins me. 5 minutes down the mountain Fabrice et Christina stop their car next to us and say, Mary and Ben can take a cab, because they live close to each other and it is me who is at the greatest risk, so I am absolutely the one needing a ride. So I get a ride home. As I comfortably begin to settle into my bed, the phone rings, it is Mary and she's walking alone, and she's afraid and she wants to talk to someone till she gets home. I was really happy to talk to her, but yes people, I was pissed!!! I have nothing against the Muslims, but in this country where people from the faith group that is most against the western world, are allowed to freely practice their faith and go around in burkas and hijabs and build mosques etc, I am not allowed to practice my own simple belief that I don't want to ruin Mt Royal by driving a car to it!!! Weird how other people interfere with other people's beliefs right? And at any given moment all these people who were with me last night would claim that they're the most respectful and most tolerant of all people!!!
And thus ended one of many of those nights, where I practice my love hate ritual with the group of people I have enjoyed the most thus far, the French Quebecois!
